This September, millions around the country will unite to celebrate a special cause, R U OK? Day. Scheduled on Thursday, 11 September 2025, this year’s R U OK? Day is the 16th since the concept’s inception in 2009, inspired by one man’s quest to ensure no family endures the pain his did when his father took his life 14 years earlier.
At the heart of R U OK? Day is the goal of fostering mass conversations among Australian friends and families, taking time out of life’s busy schedules to ask a simple question: ‘Are you okay?’
Nearly nine Australians take their life each day, while an estimated 55,000 make suicide attempts each year, highlighting the importance of raising awareness around mental health and suicide prevention.
While suicide prevention is an incredibly complex and sensitive challenge, it is often the simplest of actions that can have a lasting impact on another person. By asking someone in your life, ‘Are you okay?’ and actively and intentionally listening, you allow them to feel connected and supported. And so, while they may be okay when that question is asked, simply asking it has the potential to increase the likelihood of them seeking your support if they ever aren’t okay.
In large part, this is due to one theory on suicide prevention formulated by Dr Thomas Joiner, whose research indicates that a decreased sense of belonging is often a cause of someone taking their own life.
In 2020, one of the leading figures in Australia’s mental health sector, Alan Woodward, reviewed the organisation’s first decade of existence. Woodward concluded:
“Without R U OK?, the landscape would look very different. There is great value in demonstrating to the whole community that they can contribute to suicide prevention and then, importantly, showing them how,” he said.
“Suicide prevention requires the efforts of us all, not just professionals and experts. Through R U OK? an idea ‘to do something’ has become a cultural movement engaging all walks of life.”“Suicide knows no boundaries. It is up to all of us to look out for those we care about and start a conversation that could change a life.”
Asking ‘R U OK?’
Step 1: Ask “Are You Okay?”
When asking someone if they are okay, ensure your approach is relaxed, friendly, and concerned. To help them open up, ask questions such as ‘how are you going?’ and mention specific things that have made you concerned. It is crucial to avoid confrontation. If they don’t want to talk, you must respect their choice.
Step 2: Listen with an Open Mind
Take everything they say seriously, ensuring not to rush or interrupt the conversation. Encourage them to explain, allowing them to sit and think silently if need be. Crucially, show you’ve listened to what they’ve said by repeating what you’ve heard.
Step 3: Encourage Action
You can ask a series of questions to do this, including, ‘how would you like me to support you?’ Additionally, if they’ve been feeling down for longer than two weeks, encourage them to see a health professional and be positive about the role of professionals in getting through tough times.
Step 4: Check In
Remember to call them soon after your chat and ask if they’ve found a better way to manage the situation. Critically, staying in touch and being there for them throughout the process is important. Genuine care and concern can make a real difference.
Importantly, before checking in with a loved one and asking if they’re okay, it’s important to check you’re in the best position to do so. This includes assessing whether you’re in the right space, ready to listen genuinely, and prepared for the reality that someone might say they’re not okay.
While broaching conversations about mental health can be tricky, it’s important to remember the monumental impact they can have on someone’s life. It’s not about solving their problems, but about being a supportive presence when they most need it. For more information, visit: www.ruok.org.au.
